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MoNdAy FuNnIeS
By Cordell & Janice Vail

19 Oct 1998

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WISDOM FOR THE WEEK:

(Contributed by Margo Mathews ... thanks Margo)

Not me, but a wise person composed the following list. Wouldn't we all like to have such a person in our life and even more important, wouldn't we like to learn all of these lessons.

I've learned -
that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned -
that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned -
that there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it.

I've learned -
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned -
that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned -
that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned -
that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learned -
that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned -
that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I've learned -
that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned -
that it's not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned -
that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned -
that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do but to the best you can do.

I've learned -
that it's not what happens to people that's important. It's what they do about it.

I've learned -
that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned -
that you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I've learned -
that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned -
that it's a lot easier to react than it is to think. I've learned -
that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned -
that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned -
that it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe.

I've learned -
that no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves get farther in life.

I've learned -
that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned -
that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I've learned -
that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned -
that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself

I've learned -
that learning to forgive takes practice.

I've learned -
that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I've learned -
that no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides.

I've learned -
that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned -
that sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions. I've learned -
that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I've learned -
that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned -
that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned -
that writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pain.

I've learned -
that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

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MoNdAy FuNnIeS:

(Contributed by Richard Shipp... thanks Richard)

Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so

God asked Adam, "What is wrong with you?"

Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to.

God said he was going to give him a companion and it would be a woman. He said this person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear you children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never have a headache, and will freely give you love and compassion whenever needed.

Adam asked, "What would a woman like this cost me?"

God said, "An arm and a leg."

Adam thought for a moment, then said, " What can I get for a just a rib???"

The rest is history.

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